What’s in a name?

In Life on September 16, 2013 at 1:11 PM

As I sit here watching Tom and Jerry at 3 am, I got to thinking… What’s in a name? It’s just a string of letters hung together to make a word that makes it easier for people to identify you. In all honesty, names are bullshit.

Take for instance this kid in the south whose parents wanted to name him “Messiah”. This total crusaider judge said no, it’ll be too hard on him growing up, and changed it, when the parents just wanted to give the kid a surname. Its just a froggin name! If Mexicans can name their kids Jesus (no matter how you spell it), then why the French can’t someone name their kid messiah? I get that it’s the south, but come on.

Hell, celebrities get away with naming their kids stupid shit like ‘Apple’ and ‘Rock star, I mean Penn Jillette named his girl Moxie Crime fighter, and his boy is named Zoltan or Zoltar! I’m sure their names are the last thing that will fuck them up…

I read a book that had every baby name and its meaning in it; mine came up as “he who is like God”…OK, I’m the exception, but my point still stands. Your name doesn’t define who you are. There is man in the NFL named Aryian for shit sake! Its been a while, but I’m sure black guys are the opposite of Aryian…..no? Hell, just because he was named Adolf Hitler, does make him bad? No, his actions make him bad. Naming your kid Porsche does not make her a German sports car, its just a fucking name. Names are harmless and meaningless. Stripers are named Candi and shit like that, so where are the judges overwriting their choices and saying “no, you’ve got to be named Amanda or Katherine because naming yourself like that is bad”? Its only a name… How many Muslim boys named Muhammad? Of that, how many prophet? None…

My father was named Art, but he couldn’t draw to save his life. Names, in and of them self are meaningless. I get that you can’t go around calling yourself Human 33456778432 and that is why we are forced to have a moniker that is socially acceptable. I do recall a fee years ago that a man tried to name his kids Adolf Hitler and White Pride Arian. That’s just stupid. The Adolf kid could get around if he tried to go by Al, or even claimed to be German, but the white pride thing…that kids gonna need a name change! OK, so I guess that not all names are useless, nor should parents be trying to name their kid some totally offensive name, but for the most part, don’t try to name your boy Sue simply because you want him to be tough…


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