Let your fingers do the walking?

In annoyances on September 28, 2013 at 1:02 PM

As I sit here, I’m staring at an ancient relic. Not the lost remnants of the Magna Carta, but rather the Yellow Pages. It got me thinking who uses this anymore?

Back in its day, “the book” was it. You needed something, you looked it up in the phone book. Nowadays we have Google. I needs some info one day, and thought my mother would be able to help…she reached for the phone book! With the advent of the Internet, we don’t need it.

Why aren’t the environmentalists picketing their offices? Its well over a thousand pages…pages that are made of paper…paper that comes from trees! Hippie people love trees, no? They are cluttering up the neighborhood with their books, books that people don’t need. They should make it so that if you want it, you go down to an office, pay a small fee and they give it to you. This opening the door every year and seeing a shitty yellow bag with a fat waste of paper is asinine!

I get that the elderly use it, but most of us have the internet, and thus a book containing outdated phone numbers and address is useless. Every year I can, I catch the Yellow Pages guy and tell him “dude, I have the internet, your services are obsolete; thank you anyway”, and every time he says the same thing “I only get paid if I come back with an empty load”. Now me, not wanting to deprive anyone of an honest day’s pay, I take the book, but I always throws them out.

There are some institutions that still use them; the library for one, and they provide a service that the public can use. I don’t know why, given that then library has free internet and most have free WiFi, so once again, why do they still produce them? Hotels use them, and I guess its for the foreign tourist, but other than that…useless to a good portion of today’s market. Also, most people who travel have GPS, and most use their phone….where the internet is…so…..yeah…..not getting why the government or private enterprises are funding this relic from a bygone era.

Growing up we didn’t have the internet as it is now. If you wanted some tidbit of information, you had to use “the book” and “let your fingers do the walking”, but that was more than two decades ago, as I’ve said before, Google changed that. Granted, there are sometimes when we don’t have our internet and the “book” is my only option.
Come to think of it, I did use the phone book recently. I grew up in an era where we where taught how to look things up using guide words, so I found what I needed rather quickly. I wrote down the number (on another relic known as paper) and proceeded to call them. The name of the business was not the name I needed…I asked the polite voice on the other line if the number dialed was the correct number. She responded with “Sir, we’ve had this number for…six…years…” I apologized and told her that I just got it from the “new” phone book, to which we both shared a laugh. Now, the internet is not without its failings, but I used the inter provided from the local branch of the library and got it just fine.

In get that the phone book provides a cheap means of advertising, but their target demographic does not use it…unless that target demographic is over 40….. I for one, have never used the telephone directory since the above listed incident, and probably won’t again…at least not for a while. When you don’t have your internet handy, it does provide a service, but it is still a massive waste of time, resources and effort. In addition to my earlier idea, we should sign up for the book the way we do with the newspaper (another way us old folks get news). You know? You want the paper delivered every morning, you pay a subscription, why not do that with the phone book? Hotels and libraries could get a discount, of course, as wouldn’t he elderly.

Folks, if you need anymore information, remember, I’m in the book


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